----------- soulful transformation through the stars. -----------

9 May 2011

regret

Today I'm drinking cinnamon and clove chai. I found myself drawn to warmth. Despite the warming weather, it drizzles out there.


visual journal



Regret is an appalling waste of energy.
Je Ne Parle Francais, Katherine Mansfield




Regret, a short story by Guy De Maupassant
Regret, a short story by Kate Chopin

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Right back in my youth, I swore I would live a life of no regrets. That is, that I would choose happiness, be honest about my feelings, and take risks.... so that in my old age I would not sit and think, if only...

But we are at the mercy of more than our wishes. Life has it's own ideas. I have been mistaken in many choices, but I learnt quickly the worthlessness of regret, or of guilt.

How do you feel about regret?

11 comments:

  1. there are thoughts of regrets somewhere in the back of my mind but I don't give them the power they're looking for!

    Regrets are useless, we'll never be able to go back and do things differently, so I'm with you on your happiness philosophy.

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  2. i had a similar vow in my youth as well....alas, we know absolutely EVERYTHING when we are that young and can't conceive of things not being as we've decided they'll be...;)

    so i've taken 'regret' out of my vocabulary...and learned to look at everything as a valuable part of this long, meandering road....

    xo

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  3. I am pretty good about not feeling regret I always move forward (except the hangover nerves sometimes...) But, I am much worse about worrying. I wish I worried less!! Have a great day!

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  4. Whenever I find myself regretting some small thing, I ask myself if I would want my life to be any different right now - and really I don't. Going forward, however, I do tend to be more mindful, careful and in some cases a little bolder when making decisions than I was when I was younger - so I can hopefully look back in another 20 or 30 years and still feel as if I wouldn't change a thing. It's a balancing act, for sure!

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  5. I try very, very hard not to regret anything. I do have one very bad choice that effected the direction of my life, but looking back on it there would have had to have been divine intervention to get me to make a different choice. I think that it's okay to see yourself crystalized in a period of time. As in "At that time in my life I made a choice that wasn't for the best, either for me or someone else." By letting the choice stay in it's context the regret I have about it doesn't flow over into the rest of my life.

    I enjoyed this posta lot.
    Happy Spring,
    Claire

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  6. hi everyone, enjoyed your responses.

    claire, love the idea of crystallising a moment in time. yes, it mattered then more than now.

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  7. Beautiful quotation, to me regret is a waste of energy and time as well. It doesn't provide anything worthwhile at all. Wonderful post!

    Great journal page, I love the yellow and red with that tiny punch of black on there. And mmmmm....cinnamon clove chai. What a great treat on a drizzly day.

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  8. This is a great question. Part of my life philosophy is to live free of regret, and for the most part, this works for me. What I'm starting to learn though, is how that includes forgiving myself and practicing self-compassion when I do something "wrong", when I upset someone through my words or actions, when I screw something up. These are bigger lessons that I'm trying to be with.

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  9. thanks and welcome B!

    yes, self-forgiveness probably plays the biggest part with regret. often we blame the xternal world but more often, i think, we blame ourselves.

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  10. i adore that piece of art! and love your sweet corner of the internet.

    regret... it's hard to truly live a life free of it... sometimes when i think of the early stages of mine and my husband's relationship i cringe because i remember how a previous relationship had strained us... me.

    here is what helped me get through my regret: http://dolcevitamicaela.blogspot.com/2010/06/i-am-unredeemable.html

    ps. re: to your comment about a bubble bath and reading-- oh i have yet to fully master it too! ;) in fact, a postcard i was using as a bookmark totally got soaked when i sat up LOL

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  11. My regrets have dulled over time, but the few things I regret I still remember strongly, probably because I have taken such deep life lessons from those experiences.

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